Monday Night Raw Recap; Plus Curb Stomp Banned? Extreme Rules will SUCK!

Extreme Rules is happening this weekend from Chicago! After 2 weeks of terrible Raws, WWE will turn over an even worse PPV. Randy Orton promised to RKO the entire roster including "the undistruped future" since his finisher is banned on Sunday. Also, Ryback attacked a giant hot dog. That's all that happened this week. 

Image Credit: wwe.com

Raw was a total disappointment and to top it off Daniel Bryan is still out. "Bryan is undergoing diagnostic testing to see if he can defend his title at Extreme Rules." I wish he would stop pretending to be a 60 year old yoga instructor and remember that hes a professional wrestler. Herbs and magic will not cure your injuries. I hope this isn't a repeat if last year. 

Rumors of The Curb Stomp being banned surfaced when Rollins used a new finisher on Ziggler Monday Night. Why is there a russian chain match when WWE doesnt allow choking? Is Rusev gunna go all 50 shades and whip Cena?! The WWE has not addressed the issue and no one knows for sure if stomping a man's face into the mat is actually banned completely. I say we keep the Curb Stomp and have Orton bring back the Punt. 

-Loveblump

Mrs. CM Punk Retirement and Raw Recap

After months of rumors, WWE has announced AJ Lee's retirement from in ring competition just five days after Wrestlemania. We can only speculate the million reasons why she would want to leave. My money is on a baby. You can't be taking hits with a bun in the oven. 

Image Credit: wwe.com

Leaving on top is the best way to make return in ten years when she gets tired of those little brats. AJ did great things for the Diva's division and I am sad to see her go. Here's to hoping there's another Diva out there that can fill her boots. 

On Raw this week Orton defeats Kane, Roman Reigns, AND Ryback to become the Number 1 contender for the Heavy Weight Championship. Rollins comes in and delivers a Curb Stomp laying Orton out after his win. Doesn't he remember getting his ass kicked just two weeks ago. They never learn. That Curb Stomp will come back to bite him in the ass.

The Authority's feud with Randy Orton will get old fast and The Viper will be off working on another movie in no time. I wouldn't mind watching a little more Rollins vs Neville. The inaugural NXT Champion agaisnt the longest reigning Champion. Bring up Zayns and Owens and we can have a party! 

-Loveblump

Seth Rollins Leaves Wrestlemania a Champion While Ronda Rousey Takes Down The Authority

Like many people, I was shocked at how good Wrestlemania 31 was. 76,976 people filling up Levi's Stadium took fifth for the all time record for Mania attendees. So much awesome-ness in one show I don't know where to start so here's a re-cap of the night. 

Image Credit: wwe.com

Pre-show

Andre the Giant Battle Royal: Big Show

Fatal 4 way Tag Match: Tyson Kidd and Cesaro

Main Card

Intercontinental Championship: Daniel Bryan

Randy Orton defeats Seth Rollins

No Disqualification: Triple H

AJ Lee and Paige defeat The Bella Twins

United States Championship: Cena

Undertaker defeats Bray Wyatt

Main Event

World Heavy-weight Championship: Seth Rollins

You read that right, the guy with his dick on the internet is the WWE Heavy-weight Champion. He may not have pinned Brock but he gave Reigns the Curb Stomp of his life for the win. Speaking of Curb Stomps, the match between Rollins and Orton was my favorite of the night, after Taker, of course. Randy Orton pops out of a Curb Stomp throwing Rollins in the air with just his head. I could watch it over and over. The old men get a little help from their friends when The nWo and DX make their way to the ring half way through the match. Definitely something to check out if you didn't catch the PPV. Might as well skip the Cena match. It was long and boring and pissed me off from the beginning. Why did Rusev come out in a tank? 

I had a good time watching Wrestlemania this year. WWE really stepped up their game. Giving us something to look forward to The Rock has teamed up with Ronda Rousey to take on The Authority. After Stephanie insults Rock with a slap in the face, he searches the crowd for a familiar face. I don't watch UFC but I recognized the name. Ronda was ready to go right then and there taking out Hunter with a judo throw. She looks like she will own the WWE ring for sure. 

Nothing made me happier than watching The Deadman kick ass. He looked great out there, off the top rope, out of the ring, in the ring. It was magic. Wyatt should have known better than to try to raise hell. Hell will destroy you. 

-Loveblump

WWE Raw Recap: Wiz Rocks a Cena Shirt and Randy Orton Rocks My world

World's collide when hip hop super star Wiz Khalifa comes out for Monday Night Raw live from Pittsburgh, PA. While the rest of the universe is talking shit, I was bursting at the seems with excitement. I thoroughly enjoyed the show. Heyman was gold, #Wizdow was trending worldwide, Bray and Taker has me at the edge of my seat, and the main event was probably one of the best I've seen this year. 

Image Credit: wwe.com

Did Vince know what he was getting into when he signed off on Wiz? Controversial tweets from the stoner rapper may be considered bad press for a family friendly show. "Ever perform a song for the first time in front of millions? Ever perform a song for the first time in front of million ON WEED!" Keep it classy, Wiz. 

To add to the controversy, Randy Orton stole the show(and my heart) when he turned on The Authority and flipped 'em the bird. I don't know why this isn't making a bigger splash around the wrestling community. Granted, this isn't a first for the Viper and the split from the Authority was predictable, Orton blew my mind with his performance. They are expected to face each other at Wrestlemania later this month. 

-Loveblump    

Happy Birthday WWE Network! Fast Lane, Raw, and Chyna "Twerkin'"

This week marks the first birthday of the WWE network and the true start of the road to Wrestlemania 31. Raw opens with Randy Orton on the mic trying to explain how The Authority kept him out of action for the last four months. He should of explained why he was hanging out backstage Sunday night in his gear. While Fast Lane may not have delivered, Raw, and the announcement of free streaming of the network for 24 hours, definitely made up for it. 

Image Credit: wwe.com

After a little bit of sweet talk from Boss Lady, Orton returns to The Authority for the main event tag match. It appears that Daniel Bryan and Roman Reigns became BFFs after Fast Lane and it definitely showed in the ring Monday night. Orton and Rollins storm off with their tails between their legs. That match was the highlight of my night.

Last week TMZ reported on the terrible twerking video Chyna posted to her social media sites. From what I understand, Chyna admits to falling off the sober wagon tweeting from @ChynaJoanLaurer on February 24th. "Hi everyone. I have been kept denying the fact that I have been an alcohhol...This has been very hard... I am."  This seems to be a contributing factor to all the non-sense going on at her YouTube, Toyko Chyna. If you haven't heard, Chyna has been working in the adult entertainment industry since leaving WWE in 2001. Posing nude for Playboy, starring in 6 adult films, collecting 2 AVN awards, and working for the LA Porn Star Escort Service has been her claim to fame for the last 10 years. She has since retired and resides in Japan teaching private English classes. 

In all honesty, Chyna Doll looks like any other silly drunk girl dancing around her room in her underwear. She's just trying to live her life. Maybe she wasn't even drinking and that's just her charismatic personality. I do believe she's trying her hardest to live a normal life free of addiction. I think if these last few articles have taught me anything, it's that professional wrestlers are normal people that like to get fucked up and take pictures of their dicks. 

-Loveblump

TGIF: The Insanity of Rusev-Sheamus, No One Hit On Shelton's Momma, and More

T.G.I.F. with Matt Dawgs: #277

Good day to you all and welcome to We Want Insanity. I am your host for today, Matt Dawgs and this is my column. Today is the end of the work week and the time to look back at all the goings-on over the past seven days as I wrap it up with a bow and spout it out bit by bit. Buckle up. As previously noted, you can catch my OTHER COLUMN which is the “ WWE NETWORK PPV OF THE WEEK ” where I and 3 friends discussed an old WWE/WCW/ECW PPV from the archives. Join us on SUNDAY as we review WCW “Great American Bash 1989” and check it out to see if it is worth watching. Also check out this week’s “ THE QUESTION ” where James Guttman, James Bullock (why do we have two James writing for the site? We need to change his name to Tinashe or something) and myself answer a random question each week. This week’s “Question”, what is TV’s best theme song?

WWE NEWS AND NOTES:

- RAW = TRAIN. WRECK. Oh my god was RAW this week all over the f*cking place. Just complete lack of logic in almost every turn. Don’t believe me? Well let me break it down for you......

- Last week on RAW, the show was the start of the big Survivor Series angle involving Team Cena vs. Team Authority. Smackdown and the website all week were discussing the fact that John Cena would choose his team on RAW on Monday. I believe even the teaser WWE does on the site made note of that on Sunday. Then comes RAW on Monday and.....JOHN CENA ISN’T EVEN ON THE SHOW. WTF?!?!?! But that is just the start of the insanity.

- The show opened with a pleasant but surprisingly unannounced surprise. After a YEAR absence from television, Vince McMahon made his TRIMUPHANT RETURN to WWE television alongside his daughter and son-in-law HHH to open the show. Vince plugged the WWE Network as expected but surprisingly didn’t bother to mention the UK getting the Network as Monday was launch day there (more on this below). He then threw a curve ball out of left field that can be described as two ways. One way to describe it would be complete and utter desperation in order to get new subscribers to the Network. The second way to describe it would be Vince’s attempt to get a hot angle going and ideally the same angle that was talked about a full year ago which would pit Triple H vs. Vince’s proxy at Wrestlemania for complete control of the company. My guess is that it is a little bit of both. Vince announced that if the Authority’s team loses at Survivor Series then the Authority will NO LONGER BE IN CONTROL OF WWE. Now this is just my guess but I believe that this will lead to the tease we saw a few weeks ago with Triple H vs. The Rock at Wrestlemania as the original plan last year was for Triple H vs. “Stone Cold” Steve Austin (Vince’s 1st choice) or Triple H vs. The Rock (Vince’s 2nd choice) but both men fell through and then the Daniel Bryan phenomenon took over to they decided to scrap the idea altogether. So I think that is where we are going with this.

- Dean Ambrose and Cesaro FOUGHT AGAIN. I enjoy their matches but as noted in the last two columns, it is the same formula for RAW week in and week out. Cesaro got bloodied, not sure how and he required 5 staples to close the cut on his head on Monday. During the commercial break in his match with Dean Ambrose, WWE medical personnel were able to temporarily close the cut so he could continue the match and then put the staples in when he got backstage following the match. More Bray Wyatt magic stuff. I am not into him anymore. They did a fantastic job of killing his momentum DEAD if that was their intention.

- Remember when Cesaro won the Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal at Wrestlemania, it was treated like a big deal, he won this huge trophy and then was made a Paul Heyman guy and he got pushed to the moon? LOL. Good times.

- Should I start saying POOR MIZ? Seems that was as his matches have somehow now become a backdrop for Damien Mizdown to be showcased.

- So here is where more complete f*cking insanity comes around. The entire first hour in another desperate attempt to get more subscribers to the Network, WWE hyped that Sheamus would defend the US title vs. Rusev following RAW LIVE, exclusively on the Network. So instead of video packages to hype the match or promos from both men backstage or even in the ring hyping it, following the Miz vs. Jimmy Uso match we had SHEAMUS IN ACTION VS. TYSON KIDD!!!!! Not only that, but Sheamus F*CKING LOSES?!?!?!?!?! WHAT?????? Who in the hell was the genius who decided to have Sheamus lose a match before his “big” title defense live on the Network??? Why was this booked? And before you say that it was done to get over the Kidd/Nattie angle or that Sheamus vs. Rusev was booked last minute after the show was written, all you had to do was substitute Sheamus with R-Truth or Big E. Langston or anyone else and done the exact same match. Sheamus didn’t need to be sacrificed for it. SMH. And if for some unknown reason you decide that you NEED to have Sheamus wrestle on RAW, then have him win cleanly. That is the smartest form of booking. Oh...you needed Kidd to win? Then book him vs. someone who can afford a loss, especially since he won via countout. And on top of all that....if you needed Kidd to win then why the f*ck did Sheamus lay him out with the Brogue Kick after the match? I feel like I am in bizzaro world with this match. Mind Blowingly Dumb Booking.

- Dolph Ziggler continues his ride on the jobber train with a lame DQ win over Seth Rollins. Um...not for nothing but before the match was announced, the entire Authority came out to confront Ziggler and to try and CONVINCE HIM to join Team Authority. Triple H then proceeded to sing all sorts of praises for Ziggler. This would be an extremely useful angle and believable if DOLPH ZIGGLER EVER WON A F*CKING MATCH. This is the same Ziggler who legit just got over an 8 television match losing streak. Why are we supposed to believe he is such an asset when you book him to be a jobber with a belt? If I were Triple H, I would be encouraging Ziggler to be on Cena’s team. He is an easy elimination if you go by his television performances!!!

- By the way, 100% chance that HHH was speaking in code when he said that “something always gets in the way” of Ziggler every time he starts to rise to the top. I am sure that was a shoot disguised as a worked comment.

- The MATCH ITSELF wasn’t the type of quality you’d expect from them but Orton running in and laying out Rollins with an RKO OUTTANOWHERE was awesome and becoming a running gag. I like it. Although it is doing nothing but position Orton as a full-fledged face. It also didn’t help HHH’s argument from before the match since Rollins essentially destroyed him before curb stomping him into oblivion until the run in. BTW, Orton’s run in causes the DQ thus Ziggler loses again. Just saying.

- BTW, Orton is not scheduled for any future RAW’s between now and Survivor Series hence the show closing angle and he was actually removed by WWE from Survivor Series local ads over the weekend which is extremely odd since this RAW focused on him and Rollins competing over control of Team Authority at the PPV and more so because the PPV is IN ST. LOUIS, HIS HOMETOWN!!!!!!

- Two weeks in a row where Orton cuts a fiery promo breaking away from his slow, monotone promos. Last week I complained, this week it is growing on me.

- Who was the PROMO WITH THE EYES about? I assumed the Ascension but I am hearing others speculate Luke Harper. Anyone know? Guesses?

- More Insanity, YAY!!!! Last week Ryback randomly was a babyface and crushed his opponent to the crowd’s delight. How does WWE follow that up? By having Ryback have a back and forth COMPETITIVE MATCH with perennial jobber Titus O’Neal!!!!

- PS – I honestly think WWE is going to try and make us forget about the last year when Ryback was a mid-card/opening card heel/jobber and pretend he is a main event talent again. He is likely going to be Team Cena at Survivor Series.

- Insanity Segment Alert: What in the blue hell was up with Big Show’s teary eyed promo about wanting his friend Mark Henry back? That was incredibly lame and a bit homosexual. He misses his friend. What?

- And as you can see, creative is in panic mode doing things the completely rushed way because they don’t know where they are going with angles. BIG SHOW VS. MARK HENRY on RAW rather than at Survivor Series? Weird. Then end it in a DQ? Worse than weird.

- So that Erik Rowan SEGMENT huh?

- Definitely not enough Brie/Nikki skits with Brie being her assistant. I am thoroughly disappointed as WWE is failing to capitalize on a bunch of potentially entertaining skits.

- Wait... “ A NEW DAY IS COMING”???? Xavier Woods??? Is WWE finally going to debut Woods/Big E/Kofi as a trio? This angle started IN JULY!!!!!

- And WWE is going to call them “The New Day” instead of those lame names I heard about a few months back liek "Speed Force" or "Athletic Friends". Good.

- Zack Ryder tweeted to John Cena that he is ready if Cena needs him to be on his team at Survivor Series. WWE actually showed the tweet on RAW. WWE is oblivious to the fact that Ryder 100% did that on his own to troll the internet and WWE fell for it likely thinking that Ryder did it in storyline per the creative team’s wishes. Anyway, Ryder was on Raw and he GOT KILLED by Rusev. You know, the same Rusev who is getting a US title match LIVE on the Network following RAW. SMH.

- Mark this down, save this column. If Rusev is on Team Authority at the PPV and Team Authority is booked to lose, then I GUARAN-F*CKING-TEE that Rusev gets eliminated by DQ. If they win, Rusev will be a survivor.

- MORE INSANITY!!! Los Matadores DEFEATED the WWE Tag Team Champions in a non-title match on RAW. How are Los Matadores rewarded for their big win? They are rewarded by The Usos getting a tag team title match on Smackdown tonight in a steel cage!!!!! Read that sentence again because you might be confused by what I wrote. THE F*CKING USOS are getting a title shot tonight even though Los Matadores PINNED the champs cleanly.

- And finally, for the 186 consecutive WWE show in a row, a combination of John Cena/Dean Ambrose/Randy Orton/Kane/Seth Rollins main events a show. At least we FINALLY GOT A CLEAN FINISH in the main event rather than a DQ. It was a solid match and Orton seemed motivated even though he has made it clear backstage that he doesn’t want to be a babyface. Rollins with the clean victory using a backslide? Someone was watching Flair vs. Steamboat matches on the Network this week.

- The POST MATCH ANGLE was good stuff. Orton nailing HHH with a forearm was good and I assume that even though he is supposed to be on Team Authority, he is now a babyface since he was laid out by Rollins, Kane, Mercury, Noble and a hesitant HHH who only joined in at Stephanie’s request. The running angle is that Orton is “injured” and he is not expected to be at Survivor Series.

-Matt Dawgs  
        

Questions, Corrections, Comments, Feedback or Ideas: Dawgs@wewantinsanity.com 

- See more here: http://www.wewantinsanity.com/am2/publish/Dawgs/T_G_I_F_with_Matt_Dawgs_110714.shtml#sthash.xjDQX0MM.dpuf

WWE Monday Night Raw, Kansas City Recap: No Place to Run, No Place to Hide. The Cell Is No Ordinary Scenario.

Image Credit: wwe.com

Mick Foley returns to Monday Night Raw to visit an old friend, the steel structure, and to share some advice with the ex-members of The Sheild. Apparently, everyone had something to say last night. There wasn't much wrestling happening. If you blinked, you would have missed a match or two. Not that I'm complaining. I'd rather listen to Paul Heyman than have to watch a longer, boring Diva's match. 

We were doing so well not mentioning Brock Lesnar the last couple weeks. As Hunter gives his pep talk for Hell in a Cell, he announces the winner of Cena's Orton will take on Lesnar for the World Heavy Weight Title. He also promises the PPV will be a good show. "Being in the cell changes your life. Make The Authority proud." Heyman comes out a little later to interrupt a scuffle between Superstars. Cena threatens Heyman with an Attitude Adjustment, then chickens out. Orton delivers an RKO to both men leaving them out cold. 

Raw's main event was a 3 on 2 handicap street fight which ended in the steel cage. Chairs, tables, kendo sticks, even the cage became a weapon. Orton hits Ambrose with an RKO for the win just to endure a curb stomp from his friend, Seth Rollins. 

I couldn't believe my eyes as Foley waddles down the ramp. Seeing that beard in the ring gave me goosebumps. Foley returns to Raw to educate these naive rivals!!! Rollins and Ambrose are not ready for Hell in a Cell. Somebody is going to get seriously injured! You don't win in the cage, you survive the cage. 

"The scars you will not heal from, the scars that will haunt you for a lifetime are the emotional wounds that will not heal." 

HAVE A NICE DAY!

-Loveblump

Twitter: @LoveBlump

TGIF with Matt Dawgs: Jabronidust, Cena's Backhanded Compliment, Total Stopped Action,and More

Image Credit: wwe.com

WWE NEWS AND NOTES:

- Raw has been AWFUL of late. Honestly, I am so sick and tired of the same sh*t week in and week out. It is driving me insane. Every week it is the Authority/Rollins/Orton/Kane vs. Ambrose/Cena. It has become so redundant with the week in and week out in some way, shape or form. UGH. The only saving grace is the fact that Dean Ambrose is getting over like gangbusters and I hope that the powers that be realize this and continue to push him even after Roman Reigns comes back. They have a major star with Ambrose and I am praying that they do not cut off their nose to spit their face with him.
- Ambrose’s promo skills are so unique and entertaining. From channeling Rowdy Roddy Piper and Randy Savage, he brings something different that only Bray Wyatt brings. It is refreshing to hear the difference in their promos than everyone else on the roster. Maybe that is why they stand out from everyone else and have broken out of the pack.
- I know I sound like a broken record but what exactly is the point again of sacrificing the tag team champions to Dean Ambrose and John Cena? Goldust and Stardust were made to look like COMPLETE JABRONIES the way they lost when in fact if you didn’t want Cena and Ambrose to lose, you could have went in a hundred different directions. Having The Authority come out and distract them? Have the Usos get the win? Have Cena cost Ambrose the win and Ambrose gets pinned or vice versa? Have Cena and Ambrose get into a fight (which in fact would have played into Stephanie and HHH’s bet), or the best suggestion, NOT BOOK THEM VS. THE TAG CHAMPS TO BEGIN WITH!!!!!!
- Sigh. So A.J. last week said that she doesn’t have any friends and none of the other divas like her but she is OK with that. So she teams with Layla this week because she dislikes Layla the least vs. Paige and Alicia Fox. BTW, what happened to Fox’s crazy gimmick from a few months ago? I digress. Anyway, Layla bails on A.J. when she goes to make a tag leaving her to fend for herself. She then wins in a handicap match anyway. What was the point of doing the ANGLE then if it wasn’t going to result in the finish?
- A.J. and a partner of her choosing vs. Paige and Alicia Fox is happening next Monday on RAW. Why? She already beat them in a handicap match? I am only ok with this if it leads to someone debuting or returning like Tamina Snuka.
- Just how far does WWE go to protect John Cena? When Randy Orton was asking HHH/Steph for his match vs. the loser of the main event of RAW, WWE scripted Orton, HHH and Stephanie to make sure that none of them used the term “loser” and instead Orton said, “The Other Guy”. Read that again. Orton specifically said that whoever wins between Cena and Ambrose tonight, he wanted “the other guy”. On Smackdown, the match was promoted as the main event of the show (it isn’t). This is the 9^th time that Cena vs. Orton has taken place on a WWE PPV in a singles match and their 2^nd Hell in a Cell match as Orton won the first in 2009.
- So now both Luke Harper and Eric Rowan ARE FREE from Bray Wyatt. I am ok with this. I just hope they don’t get too greatly repackaged.
- Orton and Ziggler was the lone, in-ring bright spot of RAW. It was a very good match with an excellent finish. That RKO was INCREDIBLE.
- If you haven’t caught it yet, they have constantly been teasing for weeks now that Orton is going to turn face on Rollins and the Authority.
- Rollins vs. Swagger WAS OK. Swagger is stuck in such a rut now. He was gaining steam during his feud with Rusev but once it ended, he has been going nowhere.
- Lana is AWESOME. Not just hot as she is, but she is great in her role. I am worried that when the inevitable break up on television occurs, she is going to be stuck doing nothing of importance since she isn’t a good wrestler.

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WWE: Hell Starts Early! Monday Night Raw Recap

Image Credit: wwe.com

Just two weeks away, in Dallas, the steel cage will be lowered. You'd never guess that if it wasn't for Ambrose vs Cena. So close to a PPV and no one even mentions it. There's only one Raw left to build up to Hell in a Cell and WWE is wasting time on a mediocreshow. Who the hell is NeNe Leakes? Why do they keep bringing these nobodies out. Jake The Snake was backstage! It infuriates me that a talentless housewife takes precedence over a legend. 

One of the big matches from last night just happen to star the Big Show. Hisfued with Rusev seemed to hit a high point last week when the Rock came out to lay the smack down. This week Mark Henry interferes. Rusev wins by disqualification.

Almost the entire show was about Seth Rollins.The Triple Threat match between tag teams The Usos, Dust Bros. and Cena/Ambrose was ordered by The Authority. Orton vs Ziggler, Rollins looks on from ringside, waiting to curb stompZiggler. Rollins pins Jack Swagger right before Ortons runs in with an RKO to one up Rollins. And the main event, A No Holds Barred Contract on a Pole Match, Ambrose defeats Cena. While we're stuck with another Orton vs Cena, Ambrose gets his shot at Rollins at Hell in a Cell. 

Lets all pray that the rumors are true and we get some Hulk Hogan next week. 

-Loveblump

WWE Monday Night Raw Recap; Monday September 29th, 2014

Image Credit: www.wwe.com

Monday night Raw was live from Chicago. Home of my favorite wrestlers, CM PUNK and Colt Cabana. As much as I loved the PUNK chants, seeing the people from OneHourTees with the giant Colt Cabana head ringside made my night. It was almost as good as the real thing. 

There's not much I can complain about this week. It was a solid show full of some of the best one liners I've ever heard on Raw. "You wouldn't understand cause you're ugly!" from the The Miz has to be my favorite. The Big Show screaming at Rusev, "WE DON'TSPEAK RUSSIAN!" and Goldust with "Science-fact" are a close second. 

Hulk Hogan made a special appearance for breast cancer awareness. I'm glad they're putting him on TV. He deserves to make back some of the money he lost to his cunt of an ex-wife. Bring him on every week! Better yet, throw out JBL and make Hogan a permanent commentator, Brother. 

Why is everyone complaining about Orton vs Cena? First off, its Cena and Ambrose vs Orton and Rollings. Secondly, this is fucking amazing! Never in a million years would I have thought I'd see Cena get curb stomped! They're really beating the shit of this guy. Brock had his chance now it's time for The Authority to finish him. Highly unlikely but it's worth a shot. 

-Loveblump

Twitter: @LoveBlump

Night Of Champions and Monday Night Raw Recap

Image Credit: www.wwe.com

Brock Lesnar sucks and when he wrestles Cena again at next months PPV he's still going to suck. I'm glad he got curb stomped. It makes me like Seth Rollins so much more. Seeing he's everywhere, that's not a bad thing. Lesnar's lack of passion really bothers me. Even when Punk hated WWE he was still passionate about wrestling. I don't get Brock. SEND HIM BACK! Sunday night also marked the start of the Dust Bros. reign. Deserving of the tag team title, they wear heel well. 

As for Raw, any night i get to see the Miz's ass crack is a good night. While we're on the subject of ass, Seth Rollins butt in those leather pants. Omg, swoon. The athlete's clothes have been catching my attention a lot lately. Any one notice that Kane wears dress slacks?

Lunatic Dean Ambrose makes for exciting wrestling. He's bat shit crazy and I like it. Coming out of the box during the main event was hysterical . Who came up with that! The weirdos earned the spotlight. Let them shine! John Cena/Dean Ambrose vs. Rollins/Orton/Kane is just what I needed. Milk it for as long as you can, WWE. Long time rivalries all the way around will create some good story lines. Let's see what happens next week. 

PS. I did not like that jab at Dusty Rhodes the announcers made. Oldust is not funny.

-Loveblump

Monday Night Raw Recap:: Jerry Springer, Golddust, Randy Orton, and more.

Photo credit: wwe.com

I wish you could see the twinkle in my eye during the steel cage match. For afeud a bit past its prime, Bray Wyatt and Chris Jericho put on a good show. You should check it out. I know WWE wants to trick me into paying attention to them for two more weeks til Night of Champions. Well it worked. Jericho brought us back to "HOLY SHIT" chants. Neither a busted open forehead or a wrapped knee could stop him from flying off the top of the cage. That was all just the opening match. 

This past week made me realize I'd take a Knockout's match over a Diva's match no matter the girls. But as far as WWE vs TNA story telling, Jerry Springer proved WWE knows what people want to watch. When I can get someone to sit through an entire episode of Raw, that's not a wrestling fan, it's going to be a good night. Jerry tried to mediate an intervention between the Bella twins. We hear from their parents. Even their brother is backstage. Everyone blames Nikki. The girls attack each other, bringing down Jerry Springer. He's carried off on a stretcher. 

I thoroughly enjoy every second of this Goldust/Stardust thing. Weird sells and this is so weird. Goldust looks fantastic. I hope it lasts. Fuck the Usos. You know what else is really weird? John Cenaspends more time with Paul Heymanthan Brock Lesnar does. Let that sink in.

Crazy Randy Orton is my favorite Randy Orton. It's not your day, Reigns, next week doesn't look good either. Seth Rollins looks mighty fine standing next to Orton, though. Better watch out. Those boys look destructive. 

-Loveblump

WWE: Monday Night Raw Recap of August 25th, 2014

image cred: wwe.com

If you can get Hall of Famers on Raw, don't you think you should make them do something other than sit around and talk about John Cena. Night of Champions is next month and Hogan knows Cena is going to win, Cena knows Cena is going to win, even I know Cena is going to win! Despite every "Cena Sucks" chant, he will prevail. Or Maybe this is just wishful thinking. The only time I'm on Brock's side is when Heyman is screaming in my face that I'm on Brock's side.  

Other highlights from last night...Kane and Rollins delivered a powerful eulogy at Dean Ambrose's funeral. Reigns comes out and beats Rollins with the podium. Later that night, Reigns wins their match by disqualification. The Bella Twins are hard to watch. I really love crazy heel Nikki but Brie is so bad it ruins everything. BRING BACK STEPH!Cena vs Bray Wyatt turned into a six man tag match delivering quite the beat down to the Wyatt Family. 

The Goldust/Stardust heel turn may have been my favorite part of Raw and that's sad. Hopefully next week I'll have something good to write about. 

-Loveblump 

WWE Monday Night Raw Review: Stephanie McMahon, Brie Bella, the build up to Summer Slam, and more...

photo credit:: wwe.com

Monday night was pretty event-less. Stephanie McMahon steals the show for the second week in a row. The latest build to SummerSlam is a bit of a let down, Jericho vs Bray Wyatt. Stephanie vs Brie is the only match that really reels me in. Is there any point in watching more than the last half hour of Raw?

The "vindictive, manipulative bitch" apologizes and agrees to her first match in over a decade. Brie gets her job back in exchange she must drop all charges against her boss. This is mounting up to be the best match at SummerSlam. There's nothing I love more than Stephanie McMahon in the ring. Queue the dirty 90's cat fights. Words can't describe how excited I am!!

A lot of disappointment this week but on the plus side, the more I watch the Wyatt family, the more I fall in love with them. "The relentless Wyatts." The weirdos. They are my kind of people. Everything from their entrance theme to their mind games. Paige, on the other hand, is giving a rather mundane performance. Unless the plan is to bore us to death. Then, surprise us with a totally bat-shit crazy Paige chainsaw match. Yes, i said chainsaw. I don't think there's any other way to save her. WWE thinks AJ is too valuable and will most likely let Paige fade away. Does anyone else's heart break a little when Ole pops up on the screen for Los Matadores? I know it will never happen but my heart skips a beat for El Generico and Steen. I can still hear the "Ole ole ole ole" chant from ROH. 

I feel like I should be more excited for this Reigns vs Orton feud, but I'm not. Neither was that kid that kept screaming "RANDY YOU STINK!" I wanna see Kane kick some ass. What's the point of having him come down to the ring at all? Kane deserves the spotlight. I have to say though, this might have been the most exciting wrestling of the night. Anyone going through the announcer's table will get my attention. 

-Loveblump